Luke (10:38-42) describes how Martha and her sister Mary each responded when Jesus was a guest in their home. Martha welcomed the Lord and then busied herself with serving Him. She became anxious and resented Mary for not helping her with the work of hospitality. Mary calmly sat at the Lord’s feet, attentively listening to what He had to say to her. Christ described this as Mary choosing the ‘better part’ of their time together. Martha invested much effort to please the Lord; however, she focused on completing her work rather than her time with Him. When she was finished, Jesus would be ready to leave their home, and she would miss the opportunity to sit and listen to Him. Perhaps if Martha had first joined Mary and been fed by Christ’s words, she too would have remained calm, and she and Mary could then have served the meal together.
We are often, like Martha, ‘worried about many things’ that prevent us from attending to Christ, who is there in our midst waiting for us in that still, small whisper of a prayer.
Christmas is a wonderful time of year, yet no other time can be as exhausting as when we add so many holiday extras to our already busy lives…There is shopping and wrapping of gifts, social gatherings with coworkers and friends, school plays and children being home on school vacation, baking and food preparation, decorating our homes for Christmas, writing Christmas cards, traveling to visit extended family… and on and on it goes.
Our lengthy “to-do” list can rob us of any sense of Advent prayerful anticipation of Christ’s birth. Like Martha, we fill our time with good things but can become ‘too busy to pray.’ It is helpful if we list our essential commitments, including our prayer, with realistic time allotments on our daily calendars. This simple aid will help us to be consistent in our prayer life and clarify when we can add something to our day and when we cannot. This, in turn, will help us decline or suggest another scheduling option when asked to add something to an already busy day.
Setting realistic expectations and being open to changes in our holiday traditions can help lower our stress. If we anticipate an idealized ‘Hallmark’ family Christmas, we will be disappointed when it devolves into the dysfunction of the ‘Family Vacation’ movie. Simple changes such as family potluck dinners or selecting names for gift-giving would lower the preparation time and cost and help everyone like Mary focus on time together rather than on cooking and opening a multitude of gifts. The church celebrates Christmas until Christ’s baptism in January. Thus, scheduling a Christmas or Epiphany party in January would space out social gatherings into the new year. Likewise, our card and letter writing could be done in January when life slows down. Balancing the ‘Martha and Mary’ parts of ourselves will help us attain a healthy daily ratio of prayer and service. In this way, we will not regret our Advent activity because we will balance it with time for prayer.Consistent prayer will keep us attentive to Jesus, help us recognize His presence, and improve our ability to hear His guidance amidst the seasonal noise.
Like Mary, we will have sat and listened to Jesus throughout Advent and, in this way, truly prepared the ‘better part’ of our lives for Christ’s coming.
The Blessed Virgin Mary is our model for balancing the ‘Martha and Mary’ parts of ourselves. She was constantly in prayer even as she did her daily chores. After Gabriel’s announcement, Mary went ‘in haste’ to help Elizabeth during the last three months of Elizabeth’s pregnancy. Then Mary returned to Nazareth to face Joseph and the townspeople’s reaction to her pregnancy. She must have earnestly prayed and listened for guidance from God as she traveled to Elizabeth and then home again. The new Roman census meant she would soon be on the road again with Joseph heading for Bethlehem, and shockingly, then rushing to Egypt for safety. Mary and Joseph’s prayers had to intensify as her time drew near and as they sought God’s guidance in where to go and how to raise His son. Mary, being constantly in prayer, could listen to God, discern His desires for her life, and act in a way to carry them out. She was a true ‘Contemplative-in-Action’ busy in the service of God and others and yet always in a prayerful stance before God. As we approach this holy season;
—Let us pray that we give ourselves the gift of time with God throughout Advent this year so that we can go deep within to find that inner calmness amid the outer frenzy of the season.
—Let us work to balance our Martha activity/service with our Mary stillness/prayer so that we can selflessly put our faith into action and use our gifts and talents in the service of others.
With prayers for all to have a joyous and blessed Advent and Christmas.
By Sarah Lane